These words were originally penned by me 18 days into my sobriety and rewritten more than a dozen times until I presented them on my 30th day of sobriety. The words come entirely from the Big Book and all I did was rearrange them for effect.

Newcomer lessons (written after 30 days)

By

Jeffrey T.

 

Attention Drunks. Willing to learn?

 

Sit. Rest. Relax. Listen.

 

Alcoholism is a disease and an illness. I repeat. Alcoholism is a

disease and an illness.

 

It's insanity has prevented me from finding my Higher Power, good

coffee, intoxicating chocolate and a New York delicatessen

here in Utopia.

 

Am I ugly, unapproachable, uncommunicative, unfavourable,

unimportant, unmanageable, unpopular, unusual, unwelcome?

 

I am not unique.

 

There are many men, women, children, brothers, husbands, wifes,

and mothers who think just like me.

 

There are many who are sick, tired, cold and frightened of this unfair,

unjust world just like me.

 

I am not unique.

 

Can I be helped? Abandon my past?

 

Wine, absurd, whiskey, stupid, drugs, ridiculous, alcohol, devastating

 

Yes. It's simple. Just stop drinking. 24 Hours a day.

 

Is it possible? Yes. Just look around the room.

 

When will I, the alcoholic, get cured?

 

Sorry. Never. Yet there is a solution. And it works.

 

Bear witness to a new-found concept. Twelve Steps.

Twelve Principles.

 

Go tell your personal story to a group of anonymous drinkers.

Talk without limitation and undergo change.

 

There are no critics here.

 

Problems? Troubles? Vicissitudes? Just ask. Cannot? Ashamed?

Embarassed? Get over it.

 

Get with the program. No need to do it alone.

 

Feel sad? Laugh. Keep coming back.

 

Dislike job? Leave. Miserable circumstances? Remove yourself.

Hate employer? Quit.

 

Always another chance, another opportunity on the horizon

 

Why here? Why this particular organization?

 

It's the fellowship and love. It's the peace of sobriety.

 

No more hangover, body abuse, potential painful death

 

Doubt this? The big book clearly explains. People die from drinking.

 

Want help? First, lose your attitude.

 

Come to meetings, Saturday, Sunday, Tuesday, everyday, mornings,

afternoons, evenings

 

Listen with an open mind, learn from others' experiences.

 

Read the big book daily and treat yourself with respect.

 

Will you find words in the big book that you don't understand?

Sure. Here are a few.

 

Bedevilments. Belladonna. Delirium. Doggerel. Elba. Gaunt.

Maelstrom. Nadir. Pandemonium. Prosaic. Remonstrances. Tremens.

 

Will you find dirty words in the book. Yes. Here are a few.

 

Lips kissed. Roused. Bathtub. Sex. Bondage. Lubricant.

Self-propulsion. Thunderbolts. Swallowed. Satisfaction.

 

Our creator, who forgives and accepts, in his vast, absolute,

wonder has wonderful wishes and guidance for you and me.

 

We must discover and continually rediscover the answers

to a fulfilling life

 

Do not judge. Let someone else do the driving for a change.

 

I must learn to be patient. I know that I will see signs on my journey.

I just do not know where I am going.

 

I have the rest of my life to work on it.

 

The book says it. I believe it. I am convinced.

 

Faith works. It is absolute and beautiful.

 

Before AA I failed. I tried every method known to man.

 

Spiritual miracles do happen and I wanted to share my new-found

happiness with you today.

 

If I can do it, so can you.

 

No more alibis, excuses.

 

May God bless everybody, everything, everywhere forever

 

  With 30 days sober, I’ll take another 24.